Movies, music, cartoons, comics, food, and television. That's just the kind of stuff that keeps me up at night.

 

I’ve been listening to this album for a while now and I love it. The songs aren’t as long as they were on the previous albums, but I think that is a good thing. I love epic songs as much as the next guy, but it could get pretty ridiculous. Still, like every Mastodon album, it’s fucking awesome!

I’ve been listening to this album for a while now and I love it. The songs aren’t as long as they were on the previous albums, but I think that is a good thing. I love epic songs as much as the next guy, but it could get pretty ridiculous. Still, like every Mastodon album, it’s fucking awesome!

Alex vs. Capcom: Fate of One Game

If you’re like me, then you’re probably a huge fan of the Marvel vs. Capcom series. It’s one of my favorite games for a myriad of reasons, but the biggest reason is probably because in all seriousness it shouldn’t exist. Think back to 1996 when X-Men vs. Street Fighter just came out, who would ever think that these two completely different franchises would hook up? It makes sense because the video game and comic book fan bases tend to overlap, but in 1996 it seemed like a stretch of the imagination to see these two properties cross over.

The real craziness started with Marvel vs. Capcom, though. Being able to finally play characters who weren’t apart of Street Fighter series. These were characters who delved deeper into the Capcom lore. Although I’ll be honest, I didn’t know who the majority of the other Capcom characters. What I’m trying to say is that I finally got to kick ass as Mega Man, and that made me one happy kid.

I waited for Marvel vs. Capcom 3 since I beat Marvel vs. Capcom 2 all those years ago. I stuck by it even when Activision got the rights to all the Marvel properties; I needed for the game to happen, just so I could be sane. When it was finally announced, I was so happy, all these years of waiting finally paid off and the game looked fucking insane! There was a small problem though, Mega Man wasn’t in it. That’s what DLC is for, though! Since Capcom promised new characters via DLC, I knew it was only a time until I got to play as the blue bomber once more. Things were going to be okay.

Of course I was wrong. New characters weren’t going to be showing up in Marvel vs. Capcom 3 (Except for Jill Valentine and Shuma-Gorath), not because of limitations or anything, but because Capcom decided to do what works. We can go over how many different versions of Street Fighter II there are, but that’s been done before. It’s an easy trick to get people to keep buying your games. Maybe I’m mad because the last two Marvel vs. Capcom games were not repackaged like this. (Unless you count Marvel vs. Capcom 2 showing up with online play not too long ago.) I really trusted Capcom with this, and I bet Marvel is okay with it, so it’s not like they’re not to blame.

So what am I going to do now? I love this game so much that I’ll probably break down and just buy the damn game. However, I do have one trick up my sleeve. It’s a long shot, but I’m going to try to get a free reviewable copy of the game by using my role as a member of my college newspaper for leverage. I think I can sway Capcom into allowing me to review their newest game. I mean, I bought the collector’s edition in the tin case when the game first came out. The only problem is that my school newspaper has had a history of having trouble getting video games to review. So this will be harder to do than I thought.

I’m still not happy with either Marvel or Capcom on this decision. Both companies know how to use their fans for profit and I’m so addicted to the game that I know it will be impossible for me not to get this game. I can just hope there won’t be an Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3: Fate of Two Worlds Championship Edition coming out any time soon. (But there probably will.)

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Temptation.

Letters From Someone Who Survived the Rapture

It’s only been one day, but I can tell the world has totally changed. I didn’t think the fallout from the rapture would be this intense. Walking down what was left of the street I was appalled by everyone who was still alive and living their lives as if nothing happened. They were more afraid of me than I was of them, possibly because I brandishing a sawed off shotgun. I was just more prepared for the end of the world than everyone else, I guess.

I walked to the closest market in hopes that I would be able to stock up on the essentials. Already prices were sky high, I could tell this salesman was full of it…

"Hey, asshole! It’s the fucking end of the world! People are going to need these…Funyuns and you’re making it impossible for people to survive out here!"

He looked surprised, obviously this man let greed control him. I continued to stare him down until he spoke up.

"Sir, take what you need, just please don’t kill me!"

Playing the old, please don’t kill me routine. You wouldn’t think that I’d look over it, since it was the rapture, but he was genuinely scared.

"I’ll take these…Funyuns and a bottle of Jack Daniels… The medium bottle, I don’t have enough for the big bottles. $16.24? Lemme just…"

I put my shotgun on the floor and started to look for change in my pockets.

"Sorry about that, I just…fucking hell, I thought I had a twenty in here. Woah, this is kind of embarrassing…"

Suddenly I found the twenty and gave it to the salesman. I left with my Funyuns and Jack Daniels in one hand and my shotgun in the other.

"By the way, change your wicked ways. It’s gonna be a long five months. Trust me, you’d rather have people on your side than useless money."

The walk back was long, but I didn’t get half way there until I was stopped by some ruffians who called themselves ‘The Police’. I was outnumbered. I put down my shotgun and gave in. Whoever these ‘Police’ were they were going to take me to their leader. I’d have to either join them or die. I was contemplating both on the ride there.

"Hey son, what the hell did you think you were doing out there?"

The ‘Police’ seemed interested in the path I was taking. I looked out the window at the wasteland and with a glimmer of hope I said, “Just trying to survive the rapture… Just trying to survive the rapture.”

He let me eat the Funyuns in the car.

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Some Kinda Hate

May 2, 2011, cheers from all around the country rang up to a deafening zenith when it was announced that Osama Bin Laden had been killed by a squad of Special Forces. All around the country people were celebrating the death of a man who had caused America so much pain and suffering that it trumped that of the attack on Pearl Harbor. Millions of people finally found solace in knowing that, even if it was quick, justice had been served.

The day after it was still fresh in everyone’s minds. Being the Opinions Editor for El Paisano I knew this was going to be a big deal, there were so many different angles you could write about that I could probably write an entire page about Osama Bin Laden’s death. (And if there aren’t a lot of articles, I may just do so.) However when I finally came into the newsroom all I heard were how they felt people should feel ashamed for their sudden outburst of happiness at the news of Bin Laden’s death.

Now, I’m not some angry flag waving neo-conservative, in fact if you ask any of the people who know me they’ll probably tell you about how liberal I am. Yet, when I heard people say that people celebrating Bin Laden’s death were no better than animals, I thought it would be smart to give my two cents on the subject. I think that the reason that Americans were acting like animals at the prospect of Bin Laden’s death because we are animals.

I’m not saying that Americans are blood thirsty beasts; I’m saying that all humans are just part of another evolutionary step. This is how everyone deals with the banishment of a great evil. When Hitler was killed people celebrated in the streets, when Emperor Palpatine was killed the Ewoks partied like it was 1999. (Probably not the best choice for an example, but everyone loves Star Wars.) There are plenty of fables of people celebrating the death of an evil force because that’s what people do.

I’m not saying that we should continue to dance in the streets or play Hulk Hogan’s theme song non-stop, I’m just saying that it’s okay for people to be happy. Most people understand that this isn’t the end of Al-Qaeda and that angry Islamic zealots in the Middle East will probably use Bin Laden as a martyr, but Bin Laden was a douche! The guy was the mastermind of a massacre and you’re really going to take this time to get on your soap box and complain how killing is wrong? People have been killing as far back as anyone can remember, that’s how we got here, revenge.

I agree with Mahatma Gandhi quote of, “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.”, but screw that for a couple of seconds. I’m happy that Osama Bin Laden is dead, saying that may shock some people, but I’m glad that someone who is evil is off the face of the earth. Hope that doesn’t offend anyone

FINISH HIM!!! My Review of Mortal Kombat (2011)

I wrote this for my school newspaper, El Paisano, a few weeks ago. I thought I’d share it with you all.

In 1992 the video game Mortal Kombat was released into arcades. Riding on the shoulders of a fighting craze started by Street Fighter II, Mortal Kombat was didn’t do a lot to change the face of fighting games. It did however introduce many kids, parents and congressmen to the concept of violence in video games.

Throughout the 90s Mortal Kombat became a scapegoat for all things wrong in America. However, by the new millennium most gamers had become desensitized by gorier and more violent video games. It also didn’t help that Mortal Kombat had become a shell of its former self by then. With better fighters and gorier games out there Mortal Kombat soon found itself on the back burner when it came to video games.

With a lot of missteps in the series (Including a T rated entry), it was only a matter of time before Mortal Kombat received a reboot. Yet, what could NetherRealm Studios do to bring Mortal Kombat back to its former glory? Get back to its roots.

Mortal Kombat (2011) centers around Raiden receiving visions from a future where Shao Kahn has taken over Earthrealm. (If this sounds too confusing to you don’t worry, you won’t be tested on the material.) Raiden does his best to try to stop the outcome, but no matter what he does the outcome continues to be the same.

The fighting mechanics to the new Mortal Kombat is similar to that of the previous game Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe. It feels faster than the prior installment of the series and unlike the earlier games in the series it feels like certain characters, not just bosses, have slightly different attributes when compared to their fellow fighters.

The game adds a meter to the bottom of the screen very much like other fighters such as Street Fighter and Marvel vs.Capcom have. However the meter in Mortal Kombat is broken up into three different uses. One gives an enhanced move to your normal special attacks; the other is a combo breaker that is reminiscent of Killer Instinct. However it’s the X-Ray moves that will keep you coming back for more. The sheer amount of brutality in these moves takes you back to a time when tearing a man’s spine out was still taboo. The glee you feel when you crush a player’s rib cage will take you back to when you were an eight year old hanging out in an arcade.

Fatalities are back and this time they’ve been overhauled in the most violent ways. For a long time Mortal Kombat has felt neutered when compared to earlier installments. However not only are the fatalities in the game filled with more gore, but they are also more creative in their presentation. You get your usual staple of average decapitations, but now the game features more fun and interesting ways to slaughter your opponent. It’s like being a kid all over again!

Mortal Kombat isn’t the best fighter out there, but anyone looking for a nostalgia rush deserves to check this game out. It revitalizes the series while staying true to its roots. It’s a great game without a lot of replay value and is worthy of the Mortal Kombat name.

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My Review of The Book of Eli (2010)

Okay, so I’m late. No question about it, but when The Book of Eli first came out I was really interested in the film. As a fan of the Fallout series and post-apocalyptic stories everywhere I looked at The Book of Eli with an open mind. Sadly as the days went by I had no money to see the film and my friends who had already seen the film gave me a weird face. You know that face where they enjoyed the film, but they just found something wrong with it. I never asked since I still really wanted to see the film and I thought that it would ruin the movie. So one year later, here I am! I finally saw The Book of Eli! See? I told you I’d get around to it.

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There is more color here than there is in the entire film!

The first thing that I want to talk about is remembering when this film came out. Avatar had just come out, and the world was in awe of 3D and what it would do to the future of film. The film was bright, beautiful, shiny, and when the mercenaries weren’t trying to destroy the planet, you could see the beauty and life that was made in Avatar. Well, The Book of Eli is completely different and I don’t think the film going public was completely ready for the film. The Book of Eli seems to have suffered what a lot of early HD video games suffered from, everything look either a different shade of brown or gray. (Look at Gears of War for an example.) This doesn’t hurt the film by any means, however it is a drastic change in sci-fi cinema, especially for those who had just recently seen Avatar. That said, why would there be a lot of plant life after the apocalypse? Think people. Think.

In The Book of Eli, Eli (Denzel Washington) is told by a spiritual voice to head west with a King James bible. On his travels he is met with many notorious beings, among those is Carnegie (Gary Oldman) a man who wants the book for his own personal gain. (AKA: Power)

The acting for the most part is superb. Gary Oldman gives a great performance in the film. That guy can really pull off the crazed evil guy act. Denzel Washington is also superb in the film. It’s not his best acting role, (That would go to Malcolm X) but he plays the role of Eli well enough to keep you interested throughout the entire film. Mila Kunis isn’t all that good in the film, but damn she looks really hot. I mean, I’m not one to let a film slide because there is a hot actress in there, but if I did I might give the Book of Eli some extra points for having Mila Kunis in it. (Something about women in the post-apocalyptic times is just sexy, I guess.)

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I think I have a new entry on my sexiest celebrities list.

The ending to The Book of Eli kind of caught me off guard, but I still enjoyed it. It wasn’t a huge shock, but it did have me re-examine the film after the first watch the same way I did with Total Recall, 12 Monkeys, The Sixth Sense and those kind of movies. I wasn’t let down by the end of the movie, but I also didn’t feel fulfilled. Perhaps I held the film in higher regards than I should have. Nevertheless, I would recommend this film to any sci-fi buff or anyone who is a fan of seeing Denzel Washington kick some fucking ass. (Although I would also recommend Malcolm X, Denzel kicks ass in that movie too, just in a different way. A more black way.)

So there you have it. A movie that I was so anticipated to see that it took me a whole year to finally see it. Was it worth it? Sure. But I think there could have been one more thing that would have made this movie that much better, zombies. Yes, I know the zombiefication of the arts is getting really big, but think about it. Malcolm X taking it to those white zombies and saying, “No more will I be oppressed by ignorant white zombies!” Sounds bad ass, right?

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Not seen: The black panthers.